Death, dying and hope…

My little daddy is dying. He’s fought that cancer demon for 15 years. It’s been a good fight. But his body is worn out…his soul is weary and his heart is broken. My daddy’s a broken man going to see the One who knows all the reasons for his brokenness.

This evening I stumbled on my mother’s wedding ring in an unused jewelry case. I didn’t even know it was in my house. My parents have been divorced for many years…the result of 2 broken people not knowing how to fix their own brokenness or their broken marriage. It’s sad…

So tonight, I grieve not only the impending death of my father, but also the death of all hope of reconciliation here on earth. Only in Heaven will we see as we are seen and see each other and understand.

In a few days, my dad will be gone from this earth and waiting for his “bride” (the way he’s always seen it, no matter what the judge said…), for her forgiveness for being a mere human, for not living up to her, or our expectations, and his tears will already have been dried by his Maker. My dear father will have met his Heavenly Father and finally find the unconditional acceptance he couldn’t find here on earth.

In the meantime, I tiptoe early each morning into the room we’ve set apart for his comfort at this time, and am confronted with my frustration that he wasn’t taken during the night. What are his angels doing, for crying out loud?!! (wry smile) I suppose “they” are still getting together that heavenly choir my dad’s going to lead for a few hundred years until he decides he wants to learn something new. My guess is that he’ll turn his attention to playing a keyboard of some kind (what kind of piano-type instruments are up there anyhow?…no electricity required!) and he’ll learn to play more than his one piece…”Mary Ellen with her nose turned up,” a goofy early 1900s song that is the sole content of his undeveloped repertoire.

One morning, I’ll go in and his Heavenly escort will have shown up and he’ll be gone, leaving his physical shell and his earthly sorrows behind. There’s a bottle of champagne for the adults and Martinelli’s sparkling apple cider for the kids in the fridge just waiting for that moment. There’s a celebration just around the corner! If my dad’s headed for a party in Heaven, there’s no reason we shouldn’t rejoice for him down here!

Tags: death, dying, eternity, faith